Friday, May 1, 2009

Am I Crazy?

Hell, yes. If you have read my postings you would come to the same conclusion. How long have I been crazy? Since Nov.,18,1980. That is the day I killed a dear friend of mine. He was a USAF Full Bird Colonel, Ret. Nowadays it is called euthanasia. In 1980 it was called murder. Some states still consider it murder. Doctors are able to get away with it with the family's permission.Pull the plug, DNR, it comes in many forms. In 1980, I was a 19 y.o. medic that was convinced by a terminal cancer patient by the name of Renold DeBarge,Col.,Ret. to end his suffering. I did. That is where mine began. For the next 29 years He has tortured me in my dreams. He is not letting up,either.I became a drug addict because narcotics was the only thing I found that would quiet my demon.That is exactly what He is,my Demon.He comes to me at night when I have no control of my conscious mind.He is relentless.He can't be stopped.There is one way.Destroy where He resides.I am almost at the breaking point. I do not know how much I can take. theblogmeister