Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Dealing with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

I have been dealing with PTSD for over 25 years. The first 20+ years I used alcohol and drugs to deal with the symptoms of this disorder. This came with some serious ramifications. I spent nearly half those years in prison. Not the psychological prison but the physical one. Various drug convictions got my ass put behind bars, locked away from society. That was, by far, a lot easier than the prison I created in my mind. Some of you may wonder why I can't destroy it since I created it. I have asked myself the same question time after time. My mind has created such a monster that has power beyond belief. I have been encouraged to talk about my PTSD by the mental health professionals, thus the reason behind this journal. If you are a new reader to my blog I will give you a quick summation of my PTSD. I was a 20 year-old medic in the military with a terminal cancer patient that convinced me to help him commit suicide. That is it. I killed a man against all morals and values that I was taught as a child. If you want the whole story you can click on archives and read it all. My brain, as yet fully developed, would not let me forget that day and I have been haunted by this man since 1979. Only as recent as 5 years ago did I tell anyone of this trauma. I am currently in an inpatient treatment center designed specifically for PTSD sufferers. I am on medication to alleviate the nightmares associated with PTSD. Is it working? No. Is there hope? Hope is all I have to hold onto. theblogmeister

1 comment:

  1. Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is an extreme stress response to a traumatic event that threatens your safety or makes you feel helpless. If you have PTSD, you may believe that you’ll never get over what happened or feel normal again. But with treatment and the support of your loved ones, you can overcome your symptoms, reduce the painful memories, and move on with your life.


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.