Saturday, September 12, 2009
Friday, September 11, 2009
How is it possible to go without sleep as much as I and not be a bumbling fool? Once again, I scared the living bejeez out of my wife. It seems that she has gotten used to it, almost expecting my ear-piercing screams. She is so laid back and is not at all intimidated by my bouts of terror.. Her main concern is that I don't hurt myself during these moments of loss of control. That scares me. Just losing control of my actions. I rarely remember these spells and after hearing some of them I fear for my wife. You see, I credit her with the psychic change in me. It can be only one thing, a psychic personality change. How she figured it out, I don't know. She can bring me back from the abyss of insanity. I had been in that hole for a lot of years. I don't know how she saw a real person when all I could see was a killer. The worst kind. Killers acting like medical personnel. I try to rationalize. That does not work. I tried many ways to cope until I found one that worked. Self-medicating. Now, that worked! The next post I will tell you how and what drugs I got. It's INSANE!!!