Sunday, March 11, 2012

The Demon Visited, Again, Last Night

  For thirty years I suffered with a demon that haunted me every night. For the first time this demon was the very same demon that terrorized me all those years. Why was it the colonel? I guess he still resides in my subconscious mind, he has never left, is my guess. The Colonel tortured me until he had a reason to stop. I guess he has found a reason to start, now. If you are familiar with The Colonel of my past then you should know why he wanted me to end his life; it was because of pain. A pain so severe he could not take it, anymore. I am not, by any means, saying my pain is in the class of his. His body was eaten up by cancerous cells. My pain is severe enough, enough that 240 mgs of Morphine a day does not even touch it. My question is why am I getting visits from The Colonel? I am sure he knows what I an going through, but why now? Surely he doesn't think that I will want to do what I did to him? So, what is his motivation? To give me pointers, to tell me what it is like in the new realm that he is in? I don't even know where the hell he is. The visit I got from him last night was creepy. It was not the evil apparitions I used to get. He actually looked  like he did when he was first admitted to our floor on 2-east at Eglin Regional Hospital at Eglin AFB, Ft. Walton Beach, Fl. He looked great, with that white hair blowing in the hot Florida sun. He was tanned like he had spent the whole day playing golf in the Florida sunshine. As you may notice, I really thought the world of that man. Even though he terrorized my psychological mind for many, many years, I have considered him a friend, a mentor, almost a family member. That was before he almost ruined my pcyche. Of all the trauma he put me through, why has he chosen to enter my life,again? Is he trying to tell me something. I don't know. I guess we will find out.                                   theblogmeister

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