We are dying

 From the miracle of birth we start the process of dying. Millions of sperm start the journey to become life. Only a few make it to the fertile egg and the first one to punch through begins the gift of life. The embryo grows and in 9 months the child breaths his first breath of life and a new journey begins. There is no way of knowing how long this journey will last. The one thing we all have in common is that we are all on the same path towards death. The beauty of it all is the fact that not one life will be the same. We will be subjected to different influences and different choices will be made. Some of those choices will shorten our journey while others will make life easier. To quote a well known musician, "There are choices since the day that I was born and there were voices that told me right from wrong and if I'd listened I would not be here today. Living and dying by the choices I made." We do not think about death as we grow. We think that death will not find us until our time on earth has been lived to the fullest. We are not guaranteed life tomorrow, next week or next month. Death's meaning has eluded the greatest minds of generations. Why do innocent children get caught in gunfire of warring gangs? Why do some of the most evil of mankind live long lives? These questions cannot be answered. In my case, the death of a very dear friend by his own hand has troubled me more than my cousin's death of cancer. Both of these deaths have effected me deeply. The death I caused the colonel in 1979 has had a profound affect on my life. I have been tormented by his death and this was his plan. Why has he dominated my sub-conscious for so long? The recent deaths of my family and friends only reinforce the pain that I have been struggling with for over thirty years. Last night I was visited by the colonel, again. His demonic presence fills me with hate. It affects my waking life to the point that I sometimes consider joining him just so I can kick his ass. I know that is not feasible, though. I just want to rid him from my mind and I am trapped in the past and cannot seem to break free. I will not give up.   theblogmeister